Are you a helicopter parent? What is helicopter parenting? In age of over-parenting, you may surely have wondered about this
There are different types of parenting styles. Helicopter parenting is becoming involved in your children’s life to an overwhelming extent – such that it can become detrimental to their growth. The term is derived from the hovering-like nature of parents (like helicopters) who excessively control their kids’ lives, knowingly or unknowingly.

Characteristics of Helicopter Parents

Helicopter parents are overprotective of their children. The excessive anxiety about uncertain futures, finances, jobs and other such aspects can make helicopter parents control every small aspect of their child’s life so that they can protect them from a life of risky outcomes. The fear of the worst happening to their children can drive helicopter parents to excessively engage in their lives. For example, meddling in normal routines of teenage kids, selecting their everyday outfits, packing their bags, managing after-school activities such as meeting with friends, doing homework, playing a sport etc. – activities that older kids can handle themselves – are examples of helicopter parenting. A helicopter mom or dad can try to control their children’s lives to protect them from unhappiness or disappointment. It can also involve overcompensating for something such as lack of parental love experienced by parents themselves when they were growing up. Ever-growing competition in current school environments can also make parents become excessively involved in their child’s life to ensure that they do not fall behind.

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Effects of Helicopter Parenting

There are the adverse effects of helicopter parenting in most cases. Excessive involvement in your child’s life can prevent them from becoming critical thinkers. Guiding kids is one thing but not letting them make even small decisions or helping them learn through consequences of their actions prevents them from becoming adults who can think for themselves. You can learn about any number of parenting tips that can make you a better parent. But ultimately you need to let your kids grow as individuals who can become responsible adults.

Consequences for toddlers and young children –

Your children can develop confidence issues as a result of helicopter parenting. They may begin to think less of themselves and feel they are not good enough to take small decisions by themselves. They can become shy and not develop adequate social skills . They may also find it difficult to develop skills that are essential for day-to-day living such as crossing roads or going to a store etc. They may also grow up to be fearful individuals.

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Consequences for older children –

Helicopter parenting can have dire consequences for adolescents. Teenagers and those entering adolescence can feel inadequate for middle and high school and find it difficult to form new friendships or adjust to new environments. They may develop anxiety over small things. They can develop feelings of entitlement and expect other people to do their tasks (like their parents did) or bidding in offices or college; and even in their relationships. They may not able to cope even with small stresses . Your teenagers may even begin to resent you for controlling their lives in the extreme. Older kids can begin to see the difference between themselves and other kids not brought up by helicopter parents.  Not allowing kids to go anywhere alone, constant monitoring of their activities and doing things for kids that they can do themselves can be detrimental. It can make them lazy or irresponsible adults. Hyper-vigilance can become overbearing for teenagers and they might resort to irresponsible/ risky behaviors just to have some fun by themselves.

Thus, it can be safely concluded that while ensuring proper care for one’s children is every parent’s duty, being a helicopter parent is far from exercising one’s duty as a parent. So be a responsible parent, by giving your child the space to grow into a responsible adult!

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