“Talk to my kids about puberty? Are you kidding?”

If you’re a parent, then chances are that you’ve spoken those words. Welcome to the world of teenage parenting – one of the most challenging periods in the life of a parent. The reason why it is so challenging is apparent. Your child starts undergoing physiological, emotional, cognitive and physical changes during this period. Sometimes it’s gradual. But most of the times it’s so abrupt, that both the child and the parent end up being intensely stressed out.

Why do we need to understand teens after all?
The teenage years are the transition phase between childhood and adulthood. Both girls and boys undergo tremendous changes. This is what happens for boys:

• Their hormone pattern changes.
• There is a spurt in testosterone levels.
• The production of sperms begin.
• They are bothered by wet dreams or nocturnal emissions.
• Secondary sexual characters develop, such as physique, voice, male pattern of body hair, beard, and mustache.
• They start seeking a purpose or meaning in their existence.

And this is what happens for girls:

• They begin their monthly cycles of menstrual flow.
• Estrogen and progesterone takes control.
• They become more emotional.
• Development of secondary sexual characters like breasts, female pattern of body hair occurs.
• They start seeking a purpose or meaning in their existence.

Why should I talk to my kid about puberty?
Teenage pregnancy is a major issue in the United States. And one of the underlying reasons for this problem is the reluctance of parents to speak with their children openly about what happens during puberty and how to handle it. If parents take the initiative to talk to their children about puberty, the physical and emotional changes that occur during this time, pregnancies, etc. the incidence of teenage pregnancy can be significantly reduced. Most of the teen moms are those whose mothers, in all likelihood, failed to talk to them about puberty.

So, are you ready to talk to your kids about puberty now? Hopefully, it won’t take you much convincing now. And if you need some advice on how to go about it, then read on…

Prepare yourself
Before you talk to your kid, you need to prepare yourself for answering the questions that your kid might pose. Thanks to the internet, kids find the answers to most of their questions online, but that doesn’t mean they have all the answers or even the right ones. You need to be the one who can give them the right answers. Don’t rely solely on the Internet. Buy some books or borrow them from the library, as part of your research. Familiarize yourself with the issues facing contemporary adolescents. Feel free to consult another parent who has successfully spoken to their kid. Attend parenting workshops, read blogs, listen to podcasts, watch videos – be a sponge and absorb anything and everything that will help you better inform your child.

Break out of your shell
Many parents tend to live comfortably in a shell, unwilling to engage with their children meaningfully. If you really want to prepare your child for the challenges of puberty that lie ahead, you need to break out of that shell. Shed any inhibitions and feelings of hesitancy you might have, as you steel yourself up to talk to your kid.

Break the ice
Talking to your child is no cake walk when it comes to talking about puberty. So what you should do, before your big talk, is to take your child to his or her favorite movie, or theme park or restaurant or shopping or a dinner. This would help you establish a good rapport with your kid. Breaking the ice with your child is half the battle won.

Speak from the heart
Ultimately, you need to connect with your kid not just at an intellectual level, but an emotional one. That’s the only way your kid will truly appreciate the significance of what you’re telling them. So put all your heart into the talk. Don’t just describe puberty factually. Illustrate your explanation with real life examples, preferably from your own experience. Once you begin, your child will throw all sorts of questions at you. Make sure you can answer all their questions sincerely. This is where your preparation, both in terms of research and in terms of steeling yourself up for the talk, will come in handy.

So what are you waiting for? Find the right time and place, and give your kid that much-needed talk.